a bench

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.
– James 1:17 (NIV)

the familiar waft of my father
hits my nose
we drive to my old rink
chilly, empty
just a parking lot
and turn the ignition off
step outside

i stand aside, he sits ahead
on a bench, alone
staring up at the stars
a moment: frozen, still
and i see
an old man, sitting on a bench
getting older (the man and the bench)
the bench will most likely outlive him
and then i see

a bench,
without a man

he sits down, his daughter ahead
no longer the little girl who sat on his head
a moment: fleeting, just as it used to be
he stares up at the stars
then looks ahead
and he sees
his daughter, standing
getting older
his daughter will most likely outlive him
and he breathes

and then i see
a chance He has given me
how blessed
to have been given him by Him
a father from a Father
placed in this place
beautiful maker
wonderfully made
providers, protectors

his little girl
walks towards him
sits beside him
a moment.
they stare up at the stars
a Father and His children
placed on a bench

Author's note:

This piece is about an experience I had during Fall break last semester. It was the first time that I had come home from college and my dad and I decided to drive around after dinner. We ended up driving to my school, church, and skating rink which just so happened to represent the three core areas of my life before I left for college. When we got to my rink, we parked in the empty parking lot. It was around 8pm and we were the only ones there. Outside of the entrance to my rink sat a wooden bench. My dad ended up sitting on the bench and just sat there for a while. I was still standing near the car when I turned and saw him sitting there. In that moment, I was hit with the reality that he would not always be there and that time was only moving faster forward. I realized I hadn't appreciated my parents–and specifically, my dad–enough and that as much as I had to adjust to college, they also had to learn how to live with their daughter being states away, no longer being the little kid they always saw her as. It was a profound moment of gratitude for me. My dad and I are very similar in a lot of ways that will often lead to us butting heads (about what I couldn't even tell you). Most of the arguments that arose were very pointless but occasionally we would often let our tempers get the best of us for days, leading to petty comebacks that were fueled by annoyance and anger. I think when I saw him sitting on that bench, I saw a man who only ever wanted to protect me and care for me. And while I couldn't see it in high school, my dad was just as full of a human, created by God, as I was. He was not just my father, he too was a child of God, living his life the best he could with the gifts that God had given him. That moment really urged me to be grateful for all he was and recognize the valuable time that we had together. My hope for this piece to convey a heart of gratitude towards one of God's many gifts for us. I love you dad.